Sod is the Actual Worst

Okay so we’re trying to sell our house. For financial, not “moving far away” reasons. But here’s an issue: in order to sell a house, it needs to look pretty.

By far the worst part of the extremely limited moving experience I’ve had, that’s what my family and I have been doing for the last week or so.

But there’s a specific part of this process that I’m here to talk about today friends.

You see, in a tragic comedy of errors, Older Brother accidentally burned the crap out of our front lawn when he was putting down fertilizer this spring. This is unfortunate because people are all superficial and think that just because our lawn looks like crap, the rest of our house is crap, too. (Apparently they just don’t want to take on the work of making it look like un-crap, but whatever.)

So we are in the process of cutting all the dead crap out and re-sodding it.

Which, basically: cut out the old gross sod, prep the ground, lay down new sod.

It’s a rockin’ good time.

Wanna see?

Let’s see:

See that? Sod. And that circled patch? I dug all that ish up, suckers. Well, Younger Brother did part of that at the top, but I dug up most of it, kay? And there’s a whole chunk that I dug up that’s already re-sodded in that picture, so, basically, I’m even cooler than this picture leads you to believe.

Long story short, that job sucks, but I’m a pro.

Oh, and after we dig up all the sod, we have to dump it. But sod weighs a crap ton, and so we didn’t want to dump it at the dump because, like: it’s not trash, and that would cost a lot of money when you’re paying per pound to dump.

So we drove around and ended up off-roading into the woods where we dumped the sod, because it will grow into the ground anyway.

But we totally caught the attention of a cop, because we were wandering around in a trunk, entered the woods with a pickup full of dirt and a crap ton of shovels, and came back out without the crap ton of dirt. Just saying, it totally looked like we were dumping a body.

But he didn’t stop us, so we’re good.

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