I missed yesterday! To be fair to me, much better to miss a single day rather than the multiple weeks I usually miss. The reason for my absence will soon become clear. Please read on.
I woke up on time. Good for me! In typical quarantine-day fashion, I read 100 pages of John Rhys.
For the first time in the 500 pages I’d read to that point, there were about 50 boring pages. Seriously snore-ville. I was disappointed. Like, John, dude – for 500 pages I am riveted by your melodically styled flow of meticulously researched folklore, I have hung on your every word, and now you choose to lose me?
I got through it, and the latter half of my read yesterday was very interesting, but it was disappointing.
I whiled the day away, with television and my paint-by-sticker book (which is unbelievably addictive). I listened to Anastasia, a fan-favorite. (Me. I am the fan). I ignored the other things I meant to do yesterday – reviewing The Psychnomast, working on a monologue, reviewing my Tempest lines – in favor of … television, my paint-by-sticker book, and Anastasia.
Did I go outside? No. Was that a mistake? Yes. Do I regret it? Eh.
At 9:00 we had another Zoom meeting about The Tempest.
I’ll spare you the nitty-gritty, but, due to a number of factors, The Tempest will not be happening after all.
Realistically, I should have maybe contemplated that a 5 month hiatus and the general chaos that is a COVID world would result in the show not happening.
Unfortunately for me, the thought had not crossed my mind even once until our first Zoom meeting on the subject on Sunday.
Since everything fell apart in March, I put a lot of value in the eventual re-mounting of the show. Everything was so depressing and nothing went as I was hoping, but I knew that, in September, I would have the show. I reviewed my lines periodically, I watched a whole bunch of period drama stuff to see how royalty carry themselves. All summer, I looked forward to it. I staked a lot on it; it was a return to normalcy for me, relatively, and closure for the show I put so much work into.
It was never even a question for me. It was going to happen. I just knew it would. It would because it had to, and that was that.
So, when it turned out that the call was that the show was off, it kind of sucker-punched me. I spent last night and today very, very sad. I still am not feeling too good. Hence no blog post last night
Still very sad, I slept until noon, because that’s healthy. My lunch had already come, so I ate that, and then I finished Rhys, which was slow because I was sad, so it really took all day.
Especially since my day started at noon, but you know, c’est la vie.
I had some conversations out my window, ate dinner with Andrea on the steps. Watched The Greatest Showman and ate really a lot of chocolate. I thought about reviewing The Psychnomast or working on a monologue, but then I didn’t. I thought about how I need to cross “review my Tempest lines” out of all my daily agendas.
I talked to some friends, turned the TV back on because that’s what I do now, and here I am.
I am still, as you may be able to tell, deeply in my funk.
I know I’ll get over it. There’s a lot I’m still looking forward to this semester: my voice acting class, my job, the other fall show is still going to happen in some fashion.
But, not gonna lie, right now everything feels really super sucky, and I can’t even hug anyone because I’m on day 7 of a 14 day quarantine, and that makes me feel even more crappy.
So it’s off to bed for me, and hopefully things will start to look up tomorrow. I can start my worldbuilding process tomorrow, anyway! And that is exciting progress.