I have no idea what the original intention of this blog post was when I titled & saved it two years ago, but it’s still applicable to my life, so here we go.
Alright. So, I’ve been home and my home & state have been locked down for about a month now. A month and some days.
It is no secret that just about everyone in my house would like a dog. We all love dogs (though some of us are, unfortunately, allergic to dogs. An unfortunate setback). My youngest brothers (who are fourteen and eight) are two of the chiefest among these coveters of canines.
They convinced my parents to make a bargain with them: if they can get the house clean and keep it that way for a full thirty days, they can have a dog.
Now, here’s the thing. I figured my parents were making a bargain with an inherent and fool proof victory for them. There is no way that my two youngest brothers can get the house clean, let alone maintain it – especially since that includes the garage, which hasn’t been fully unpacked, let alone clean, since we moved in last summer.
So, by my estimation, my parents would get a couple spots of the house marginally cleaner and not have to procure, train, and keep up a dog. A win-win for them, I thought.
However, upon further conversation, I have discovered that my parents did not make this bargain for this bets-hedged win-win reason; they legitimately intend to procure a dog for the household if the boys can successfully complete their end of the bargain.
This is all well and good, I suppose. I still have approximately no faith in the boys’ ability to complete the house cleaning element of the deal. (It’s been over a month and they are not even remotely close to having the whole house clean. They quickly lost momentum. I’m not gonna say that’s what I expected, but…)
Here’s the issue, though: suppose they succeed. Or suppose my parents break and get them a dog regardless of their success.
I don’t live here full time anymore! Where does that leave me? Dogless! Lonely! Sad!
Exactly what I am now, but I will have the knowledge of a dog that could remedy all of those things – a dog I still cannot possess because it is too far from me.
That is all.
I really want a dog.