Last Dose of Steroids

On my last dose!

And it is 1:09 am. So, yeah. Insomnia!

But seriously, a plane just flew over head. Who lands a plans at 1 am? Seriously bro? Too late. Or early. Same thing, really.

I have been driving for très días. I think the accent might be backwards on trés. Yes, it definitely is the first time. Oh, well. Sorry, I’m a dumb American. Yo no hablo Español.

Anyway! Driving. I don’t think I’m an entirely egregious failure at it. Lots of things make me nervous still, but I think I’m getting the feel for being in the Driver’s Seat.

Dad made me drive on a real road, with a real speed limit, and real traffic. For, like, thirty feet, but still, nerve wracking. Totally could have died.

Oh! Update! Oldest Brother is done reading through my rough draft of The Psychnomast.

Don’t get excited, though, because apparently he says he should read through it once more and get a more rounded idea of the book and come up with some big finishing statement before he can send it back to me. So, yeah.

Am I coming off as a little manic? Because I totally am. I sort of did the math, and I figure, in the first week, I’ve gotten about thirty-three hours of sleep. Give or take. For reference, a teenager is supposed to get, on average, 63-63 1/2 hours of sleep in a week.

So, yeah, little ways off from that goal.

“But, you’re, like, writing a blog post at almost 1:30 in the morning. Seriously? You could actually TRY to sleep.”

GUYS. Trust me, I’ve already tried tonight, and for the last six nights, it’s just not happening, and writing a blog post is more enjoyable than staring at my ceiling for another monotonous chunk of time.

Believe me, I want to sleep. I have actual bone-deep exhaustion right now, okay? Remember the whole thirty-three hours of sleep thing? My brain just isn’t tired and won’t shut up.

Stupid medicine. Never going on this crap again. There are other stinking anti-inflammatory drugs.

Want to know some fun games to play when you’re bored? Like, for instance, lying awake at 1:26 am? I have some great ones:

1. See how far out of your bed you can lean, without falling out, to grab a thing. Or turn on your space heater because it’s too cold.

2. Count things. For example, I have 29 things hanging on my walls and interior of my bedroom door. There are 2 bags, 2 pairs of shoes, 16 articles of clothing, 1 binder, 1 space heater, 1 radio/CD player, 1 toy police car, 2 throw pillows, and 1 set of comforter/sheets strewn across my room. I’m not brave enough to look and count what’s under my bed.

3. Try and listen to see if you can hear anything happening in the rest of the house or outside. (Not recommended for the paranoid). Dogs bark a lot for no reason. Also, the furnace is really loud.

4. Draw stupid cartoons and then post them on your blog. Or just draw stupid cartoons.

5. Write in a journal. Because, what else are you supposed to do?

6. Make a plan for the apocalypse. Zombie, alien, nuclear, or other. I have one for each. I could share, if you so desire.

7. Count how many hours of sleep you would get if you went to sleep right now. This one never, ever gets old. Never. Especially fun when you have to wake up early for something.

8. See if you can turn your lamp on and off without using your hands. Especially tricky with a twisty-light switch.

9. Go turn off all the lights and make sure all the doors are locked, super stealthy like. Flashlight recommended, lots of tripping hazards. Don’t knock anything over, people are sleeping. But don’t be wasting that electricity!

10. See if you’re telekinetic and can move things from across the room. Especially effective when very punchy, but still can’t sleep.

So, some of these might not be very game-y, but they are infinitely more entertaining than staring at my dark wall or ceiling, just saying.

1:39 am.

Still not tired.

I should try to sleep again, though.

I guarantee you that I’m looking at, at least, another two hours of ceiling.

See what I did there? I’m so clever.

Side note, my left leg mysteriously spawns bruises. I don’t know how just about any of these got here. My right leg only has, like, two bruises, and my left has five.

But seriously, I’ll try to sleep now. I pinky promise.

G’night, way over from 1:47 in the am.

Be happy, be safe!

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